Negotiating the rocky terrain In his long career as a rabbi, Harold S. Kushner, the author of the iconic When Bad Things Happen to Good People, has prepared many couples for marriage. Rabbi Kushner writes: “Think of two married couples. One couple insists that they have never had a serious quarrel in all the years they have been married. They have never spoken a harsh word to each other. Each considers the other his or her best friend in the world. The other couple has lost count of the number of angry, screaming, ashtraythrowing fights they have had. Time and again, they have found themselves wondering if their relationship had a future. But every time they pondered the option of separation, they would peer into the abyss and step back from it. They would remember how much they had shared and realize how much they cared for each other. Which relationship would you think to be stronger, more able to survive an unanticipated downturn or sudden tragedy? I would have more confidence in the second couple, who have been taught by experience how strong the bond between them is.” In today’s Gospel, Jesus calls all of us to the work of “shepherding.” As Rabbi Kushner has found in working with married couples, we all find ourselves, at one time or another, at the “abyss”; sometimes we are the shepherd who reaches out to the one in trouble; at other times, we are the one in need of a shepherd’s hand. “Good shepherding” is not dominating or patronizing; it is not for the weak and self-absorbed. The “good shepherding” that Jesus models in the Gospels is the selfless and generous work of bringing compassion and healing to the sick and troubled, of bringing back the lost, of enabling those who fear and doubt to embrace the mercy and love of God. -Jay Cormier
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